Wednesday, November 24, 2010 11/24/2010 10:43:00 AM

back to Msia...

♥it's been a while i did not update any post...
life has been busy and contented at da same time i guess...
but then now when back msia...
family commitments had came back to it's own reality...
i understand that outside there there's ppl hu are so committed in thei family at young age...
perhaps they had no choice....
or perhaps they could compromise with it...
and i'm tat type that could not do such thing...
it's too huge for me...
i'm not even earning my own salary yet...
n i'm trying 2 make my future brighter...

everytime i get 2 involve with school activities...
that will show ppl that how active and passion i am...
a family commitment juz bug into my life...
it did not juz happen once...
but a few times...

she always say that we're not close 2 each other...
coz we don't interact like how a lovely family would do...
but have u ever realised how hard i have 2 keep up with my studies?
juz 2 get a recognition from my own family...
i did not get recognition from my family...
but i get recognition from frens...
frens are juz not enough 2 make me motivated...
tat's when family comes 2 place...

well my family is not even a lovely 1...
i can't expect much of it either...
and yet they're always expecting so much from me...
and not giving me some encouragement...
coz they dun understand da nature of my course...
da stress is so huge...
trying 2 fight for a place for competition...
n it's so hard...
coz every1 is so good....

STRESS!

Friday, November 5, 2010 11/05/2010 01:37:00 AM

walking around town...

♥2 days ady walking around town aimlessly...
but ytd went to the Jardin des Plantes / Musee Toulouse...
see alot of things...
but most of da things are fake...
n da plants there all dying off coz it's already autumn...

it's nice 2 walke aimlessly...
walk 2 da wrong road and found some interesting places...
it's quite fun but it's tiring also...
2day went 2 all those sex shop coz my fren wanna go...
but end up me standing outside da shop waiting for my frens 2 see finish...

now waiting for porridge 2 cook...
finally there's something super asian for us 2 eat....
that's all for 2day...
will post more bout feelings next update...
=)

Monday, November 1, 2010 11/01/2010 10:20:00 PM

zhadao results...

11/01/2010 02:09:00 AM

Secrets....

♥ Been in France for almost 7 weeks...
learnt so much about people...
and i learnt alot about secrets...
there are so many secrets going around...
if i was still my old me...
i would be running around asking alot of questions...
questions just to dig out all da secrets...
and in the end i will end up hurting myself...
'cause there's a possibility that the secret is about me...

the now me knows that digging out secrets...
is a no-go situation...
'cause when after you know it...
it hurts...
so why not just prevent it from happening...
but letting everything go...
and just carry on with our lives...
that's what i'm trying to practice here...

i'll try to concentrate on the "change"...
i heard about this topic by Reverend Mahinda...
"change"...
when you make your mind so mindful that you can actually notice the "change"..
and from that "change" i'll evaluate is it a good or bad...
then we let go of it...
'cause by letting go of it...
it makes us practise impermenance...

so now everything is changing...
it can be something materialistic...
or something abstract...
i just need to notice it...

as i said...
alot of things happened in these 7 weeks...
alot of changes...
all i need is to adapt it...
evaluate what is right and wrong...
and carry on with my life...


*This is my Fallen Secrets.....