Friday, September 26, 2008 9/26/2008 04:52:00 PM

distance....

♥me n him... suddenly feel tat there's something blocking us.. having obstacles... until we're now in a distance tat he is at d far end of the world... everytime we start msg-ing.. i can feel tat he dun even feel like caring bout wad i am doing wor wad... juz answer my msg simply... everytime when i start thinking... 'have i done anything wrong?' 'mayb he hates me now.' 'mayb he juz thinks tat i'm a noisy gal.' 'mayb i'm juz a leech 2 him.' 'mayb i juz dun understand him' 'but does he understand me?' 'does he know tat i'm actually suffering?' 'does he know tat whenever i think bout him i could juz cry?' 'does he know tat i'm sacrificing so many things?' 'does he know how i feel when he juz simply answer my msgs i feel so down?'

there's juz so many thing running into my mind... sometimes i'll juz think nonsense stuff.. when i cross any roads... how i wish a car would juz come n bang me... or mayb when i stand on high buildings.. i juz wish tat i could juz jump down from there.. or juz take a knife n start slicing myself.. seeing blood flowing would juz make me so much happier.. da pain of it might juz wash away da pain i am having inside my heart...

i juz really realise tat loving some1 is juz so much more pain than being loved... i was once being loved.. but now.. i guess there's no more... coz it's my turn 2 love some1... now i understand how pain is it.......